Home > Je ne sais quoi > Feeling lonely? You are not alone!

Feeling lonely? You are not alone!

I don’t know about you but I have been feeling pretty lonely lately.
I guess is just lack of human contact that’s making me feel this way.

Over the past several months, ok maybe more like the past few years my most intimate relationship has been with… .well my laptop, my Mac.

She and I have lately developed a bit of an obsessive relationship, almost co dependent if you really want to know.

Mac and I are practically inseparable. Our relationship has been going on now for over 14 years but it has never been quite as strong as it’s been lately.

We have so much in common, Facebook, Twitter, Entourage, Firefox, Safari, Gmail, Skype, my blog and so on.

It’s becoming a little too intense and I am beginning to feel like I cant live without her. She is one of the last things I turn to before I go to sleep at night and the first one I gravitate to when I wake up in the morning. I don’t have a dog but I have Mac.

I don’t know about the rest of you but working night and day and day and night in front of a computer has its down sides and can really get quite lonely.

I know I am not alone to have this kind of “lifestyle.” I am sure many of you do as well, whether you admit to it or not. Some of you may just say that its not your choice that things just worked out that way. Some of you can even claim you were born that way or it was society or your environment that made you this way.

So many of us today spend hours at a time in front of our computers that our lives almost become a virtual existence.

In my field, representing international illustrators my work revolves around my Mac. I meet clients on line and discuss with them via email, Skype or Facebook.
I can’t remember the last time I shook a clients hand. Even if I wanted to go and meet people face to face they would question it or wonder why I don’t just send an email or a link to our website.

On the personal note, I barely use the phone anymore either. I mean my own mother who is, lets just say in her 70’s for argument sake, knows exactly what I am up to because she follows me on Twitter or sees my posts on Facebook.

My other friends just send a quick email or a poke to say hello.

I never imagined in a million years that my relationship with Mac would turn out this way. When we first met 14 years ago, she was but a 150 meg black and white little laptop that would help me out now and again with various chores. And before her my only computer knowledge was how to use my bankcard.

Boy, have things changed!

I have recently realized that if I wanted to, I could sit with Mac all day or until I went to bed. But no, I refuse to have her run my life as close as we have become, there is more to life than our symbiotic relationship.

We all need to just get out of our houses, offices and studios a little more and see what’s out there. We need to have more human contact or we are going to go nuts. We also need to build meaningful relationships and friendships and not just the ones on FB.

Like elephants, we need to be around other members of our species and not just virtually.

Now that I have my BlackBerry Bold, there are no more excuses!

See you Mac, I am out of here!

Categories: Je ne sais quoi
  1. Violet Lemay
    May 14, 2009 at 10:49 pm

    Indeed Anna! The human race needs you. Mac won’t mind. Get out there and mingle already!

  2. May 14, 2009 at 11:23 pm

    It’s so true. Illustration on a day to day basis is lonely as it is. You add another layer of separation, facebook, email etc. and the hole looks even deeper. I tend to drag others out to coffee shops for a sketchfest from time to time. Thanks for this, it’s something we all go through and sometimes we need to unplug. Cheers!

  3. May 15, 2009 at 1:17 am

    I know how you feel. I too have a co dependent relationship with my mac. I turn to her first when I wake up in the morning and set her on my night stand when I go to bed. Lately though I have had my mistress on the side, my G1 google phone.

  4. Marta Antelo
    May 15, 2009 at 8:36 am

    Hi Anna!
    I feel very identified with this text. Thanks for remember us the danger of something that could be an obssesion…or an illness
    Greetings!
    M

  5. May 15, 2009 at 8:39 am

    Bonjour Anna . You know me (Le Gamain illustrateur de Paris.)
    You are right and wrong . in the paradox as an alcoholic drinking to forget that she drinks . The second paradox ( and that is a good news ) it’s that the border between the real and virtual is not really established. We can be physically with sombody without being with her mind and ther reciprocally. Isn’t it lke that since always ? Anyway I préciously kept your email of 2007/14/03- 16:47 or you saiy to me that my work is nice and you would be interested in talking with me but you’r leaving on vacation. It’s time for us and our Mac to have a meaningful relationships. As nice as the persons in the old time could have could have it who wrote with a feather. The only big difference is that it takes not months but only about seconds today !… We live a wonderful time who is terrifying also. I believe to know that it was always so. Do not you ?

  6. May 15, 2009 at 3:25 pm

    You hit the nail on the head.

  7. May 15, 2009 at 9:15 pm

    … so true… do not forget that if we sit on our “butt” all day/week/month long, that butt will become huge!!!🙂 We don’t want that, do we? I am finishing typing this and I am going for a walk… who knows, I may even say hi to some humans, too (let’s live dangerously!). BTW I noticed that I was spending a little too much time on the computer one day when….I started searching for the undo key after dropping a plate full of pasta (!).

  8. Karin
    May 16, 2009 at 1:41 am

    Anna, i love this little article. Tina Fey – it’s time to retire…

  9. May 16, 2009 at 6:02 pm

    I completely agree with you Anna.

  10. May 16, 2009 at 9:29 pm

    I can definitely relate. isn’t it all so intangible? I tend to forget connections and conversations made on-line quicker than if I’ve actually talked to a person.

  11. May 19, 2009 at 12:31 pm

    hey anna,

    know very well, what you are describing. i sometimes want to hug my screen, because it is the only connection to my far-away-love at the moment. virtual relationships and mobile offices really changed my life and gave a lot of possibilities. but if my best friends wouldn’t live next door, i probably would loose touch to reality. here is an interesting article about virtual relationships (i made a small animation for): http://www.receiver.vodafone.com/ill-take-my-community-to-go

  12. May 26, 2009 at 10:05 am

    The big thing of modern communication is that people all around the world can chat/talk to each other. Or receive new letters from Canada, whilst living in the Netherlands.
    My answer to your message: invite people for a drink and a bit to eat.
    Or is that to much a solution from old fashioned Europe, and from a small country like the Netherlands?
    Gert Gerrits, Association of Dutch Designers.

  13. 112mirabela
    July 30, 2009 at 12:46 pm

    Well, dear Anna, your candor is endearing.🙂 I can only say the lifestyle you have is mine also. And yes, you are right, there is more to life out of our computer arena. Since I am an artist, I can always (and I do that frequently nowadays) go to my analog desk and hold a real life brush … or take a sketch book and go outside and draw with real life pencil and meet people! That’s a very nice change! That change and some rest from computer makes the internet communication richer, more fluent and humane …🙂

  14. October 28, 2009 at 11:43 am

    I totally agree with you Anna, I’m glad I’m not alone … well I guess I am.😉

    Most of the time when I get home I turn on the Mac first thing, ‘just because’, even before feeding our cat. I turn it on as if it was a life support, just so I know is there. Why?, I don’t know but I am sure if I stare at the screen for another 10 minutes I will find a reason for it.

  15. March 11, 2011 at 9:42 am

    Great advice!!

  16. March 13, 2013 at 7:52 pm

    I am feeling the same way Anna! I have gone so far as to make a list of people I need to write a handwritten note to, make an actual phone call to or meet with over a meal. I keep tabs on most of those on my list through facebook and the like, but nothing compares to face to face, sharing smiles and giving a hug, hearing a familiar voice and sharing a laugh or a few tears. Hope you get connected to those who are probably missing you and will benefit from that face to face encounter with you as much as you will!

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